Thursday, May 23, 2013

Towel in Trousers

They'll spare you if you loot, 
Molest a woman, they will scoot, 
But if you scowl
Or wear a towel
You're arrested, 'cos you're a brute.

Thursday, February 14, 2013

Valentine's Day Blues

He sobbed and then confessed, 
He declared you were the best, 
He has a wife,
Has girl friends rife, 
Lady, dump this moronic pest.

Valentine's Day's a waste of time
The love songs are pantomime
Marketers use tricks 
To bankrupt you quick
And leave you without a dime.

He'll swear undying love
Compare you to stars above
On Valentine's Day
You'll receive a bouquet
Then swiftly give you the shove.

Wednesday, January 30, 2013

Bleeding Heart Liberals

Bleeding heart liberals will quail
Save terrorists and rapists they wail, 
For barborous crimes
Libs will chime
"Why weren't they granted bail."

Thursday, October 18, 2012

What's the Big Deal?

From the poor the crooks began to steal, 
Then the victims decided to squeal, 
"It's a paltry sum
A few lakhs ain't fun,"
Asked a leader, "What's the big deal?"

Wednesday, September 12, 2012

Motamaal Baby

As a member of the elite flock,
You augment your assets and stock,
Silver spoons at birth
Won't add to net worth
So you're rewarded free coal blocks

The word "Motamaal" popularized by BJP leader Sushma Swaraj, signifies 'fat sums' or 'massive profits.' 

Wednesday, August 15, 2012

"Not Waving but Drowning"


The scammers who loot are clowning,
The dolts who cheat, we're crowning, 
When the bandits cheered, 
The serfs all jeered 
Because we're not waving, we're drowning. 

Apologies to Stevie Smith who wrote the poem "Not Waving but Drowning." Happy Independence Day!

Friday, August 3, 2012

Darkness at Noon

When millions endured power cuts
A UPA spokesman did strut
"A crisis it is not,"
Said he, with a swat, 
Folks, better keep your mouths shut.

Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Flushed with Funds

On board the profligacy train
Montek planned in his brilliant brain
*35 lakhs for 2 loos
Caused quite a ballyhoo
Our taxes just went down the drain. 

*1 lakh = Rs 100,000

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Smelling of Roses

A. Raja was granted bail
Like a hero he stepped out of jail;
His supporters elated, 
Their joy unabated 
More scams for him to inhale?

Monday, April 30, 2012

'Reel' Trouble

You and your lover got laid,
A film your rendezvous betrayed,
You're both so hot
You're caught, so what
You were discussing tariffs and trade.

Monday, April 16, 2012

Lies, Damned Lies and Statistics


The new IIP* numbers were out, 
Wild data was bruited about, 
Economists are tense 
Figures don't make sense 
Who's compiled them? Statistical louts?

IIP: Index of Industrial Production

Thursday, March 29, 2012

Voodoo Planning

Earn less than rupees twenty eight,
You're poor, states a policy potentate
If you earn twenty nine,
Order Burgundy wine
Says the wizard in economics debates.

Monday, March 12, 2012


Cotton exports would face a ban,
Announced the government with elan,
Then the ban was revoked,
In one swift stroke,
Are U-turns a new game plan?

Thursday, March 1, 2012

Red and Blue

Paint Kolkata blue, Mamata said, 
Residents' hearts were filled with dread,
They revolted and complained
She hollered with disdain
"Because the Communists painted the town red."

Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Valentine's Prey

On V-Day he will give you a ring
With rose bouquets he will sing, 
You'll soon discover
He's a two-timing lover
You're just one in a series of flings.