Lies, Damned Lies and Statistics

 

The new IIP* numbers were out, 

Wild data was bruited about, 

Economists are tense 

Figures don't make sense 

Who's compiled them? Statistical louts?

IIP: Index of Industrial Production

Voodoo Planning

Earn less than rupees twenty eight,

You're poor, states a policy potentate

If you earn twenty nine,

Order Burgundy wine

Says the wizard in economics debates.

Happy New Jeer

2011 was not a year of cheer

With inflation life was austere,

Prices continue to be high,

And consumers do cry, 

Nothing's changed; Happy New Year.

The Onionee

At ninety rupees onions are dear, 
Rupee's worthless, Reserve Bank fears 
"The onion you see 
Is the new currency,"  
Says the Bank's Governor in tears. 

Stop whining about the fuel price hike

"The fuel price rise," the PM explains, 

"Will reduce the budget deficit, so don't complain,

The price hikes are a bitter pill, 

You paupers have to pay the bill, 

Stop whining, and drink some champagne."

Prayer: the inflation slayer

Inflation's causing citizens to despair,

Policy wonks claim it's a short-lived affair;

As prices rise, 

The PM beseeches the skies,

Hopes ride on the wings of a prayer.

Inflation and distraction

Eighteen percent food inflation

Should grip our leaders' urgent attention,

But they don't give a damn,

Their concern a mere sham,

Because they've diverted us with cheap titillation.

You had better eat cement

Inflation soars, potato prices climb 132 per cent,
The government advises: you had better eat cement.