'Reel' Trouble

You and your lover got laid,
A film your rendezvous betrayed,
You're both so hot
You're caught, so what
You were discussing tariffs and trade.

Lies, Damned Lies and Statistics

 

The new IIP* numbers were out, 

Wild data was bruited about, 

Economists are tense 

Figures don't make sense 

Who's compiled them? Statistical louts?

IIP: Index of Industrial Production

Voodoo Planning

Earn less than rupees twenty eight,

You're poor, states a policy potentate

If you earn twenty nine,

Order Burgundy wine

Says the wizard in economics debates.

U-turn

Cotton exports would face a ban,

Announced the government with elan,

Then the ban was revoked,

In one swift stroke,

Are U-turns a new game plan?

Red and Blue

Paint Kolkata blue, Mamata said, 

Residents' hearts were filled with dread,

They revolted and complained

She hollered with disdain

"Because the Communists painted the town red."

Valentine's Prey

On V-Day he will give you a ring
With rose bouquets he will sing, 
You'll soon discover
He's a two-timing lover
You're just one in a series of flings.

Bread and Circuses

In 100 AD, poet Juvenal declared

Bread and circuses had Romans ensnared,

With subsidies we're sustained,

Reality shows numb our brains,

We're engrossed in our vanity fairs.

Happy New Jeer

2011 was not a year of cheer

With inflation life was austere,

Prices continue to be high,

And consumers do cry, 

Nothing's changed; Happy New Year.

Wine, Tweet and Song

I'm in a melancholic funk, 

Sip wine, they'll call me drunk,

If I sing a song, 

They'll say I'm wrong

I think I'll become a monk. 

FDI: Frantic Didi Intervenes

FDI's been put on hold 

Indefinitely, so we're told, 

So Mamata said,

Ministers ran and fled, 

And the PM's out in the cold.

Free for All

Mamata set the rioters free

Who were on a destructive spree

"Don't you dare dictate

How I run my state

So please stop harassing me."

Beauty and the Botox

You love their pouts and their smiles,

Their looks defy age all the while, 

That actor's face, 

Of wrinkles not a trace, 

It's the Botox and the surgeon's guile.

BPL: Babus' Pathetic Lies

You can live on 32 rupees,

With Planning Commission's expertise,

When mandarins croak,

Such pathetic jokes,

They suffer from deficiency disease.

Behenji's Sandal Park

The UP memorials are eyesores, 

Designer sandals Behenji adores, 

In a private jet a pair

Arrived for her to wear

Expect statues of sandals galore. 

His Master's Voice

Anna's corrupt from head to toe,

Said Tiwari, his face all aglow,

His facile regret

Maybe a veiled threat

To abuse on nightly news shows.