Terms of Endearment

If an Indian woman has you transfixed,
Don't kiss her say the Tourism hicks,
If you are really keen,
Find and kiss a beauty queen,
As for the rest, play safe, discuss politics! 
(Travel advisory to visitors to The Commonwealth Games)

On her Majesty's Statue Service

For statues Mayawati decrees a Special Monument Force

A battalion the Governor is loath to endorse

The statues and memorials

Mark her rule dictatorial

In UP, orders flow from only one source.

Mulayam's wobbly ladder

Mulayam Singh climbed a wobbly ladder

While descending became daft and emerged sadder

He said, men would catcall

Elected rich women, who were dolls

India's women are enraged and getting madder.

Amar Singh's out in the cold

Amar Singh's out in the cold,

With a gaggle of celebrities grown old;

His party's kaput,

He shoots himself in the foot,

His manic rants multiply fivefold.