What's the Big Deal?

From the poor the crooks began to steal, 
Then the victims decided to squeal, 
"It's a paltry sum
A few lakhs ain't fun,"
Asked a leader, "What's the big deal?"

Motamaal Baby

As a member of the elite flock,
You augment your assets and stock,
Silver spoons at birth
Won't add to net worth
So you're rewarded free coal blocks. 

The word "Motamaal" popularized by BJP leader Sushma Swaraj, signifies 'fat sums' or 'massive profits.' 

Darkness at Noon

When millions endured power cuts

A UPA spokesman did strut

"A crisis it is not,"

Said he, with a swat, 

Folks, better keep your mouths shut.

'Reel' Trouble

You and your lover got laid,
A film your rendezvous betrayed,
You're both so hot
You're caught, so what
You were discussing tariffs and trade.

Lies, Damned Lies and Statistics

 

The new IIP* numbers were out, 

Wild data was bruited about, 

Economists are tense 

Figures don't make sense 

Who's compiled them? Statistical louts?

IIP: Index of Industrial Production

Valentine's Prey

On V-Day he will give you a ring
With rose bouquets he will sing, 
You'll soon discover
He's a two-timing lover
You're just one in a series of flings.

Wine, Tweet and Song

I'm in a melancholic funk, 

Sip wine, they'll call me drunk,

If I sing a song, 

They'll say I'm wrong

I think I'll become a monk. 

FDI: Frantic Didi Intervenes

FDI's been put on hold 

Indefinitely, so we're told, 

So Mamata said,

Ministers ran and fled, 

And the PM's out in the cold.

BPL: Babus' Pathetic Lies

You can live on 32 rupees,

With Planning Commission's expertise,

When mandarins croak,

Such pathetic jokes,

They suffer from deficiency disease.

His Master's Voice

Anna's corrupt from head to toe,

Said Tiwari, his face all aglow,

His facile regret

Maybe a veiled threat

To abuse on nightly news shows. 

Sheila's CAGmire

Chief Minister Sheila Dikshit

Is mired in a scammer's pit

"It's Kalmadi's fault 

That the scams did vault 

And causing my hysterical fits."

The Sleepwalk Shuffle

The PM shuffled the ministerial dudes, 

And inducted a few, all dull-hued, 

Critics gave a thumbs down, 

To the new set of clowns, 

Proclaiming "What a vacuous brood!" 

Rich Tea and Sympathy

Kalmadi, the Tihar detainee,
Drank tea and purred with glee:
"Tihar Jail's the new Ritz,
For snacks and biscuits,"
While he sunbathed for Vitamin D.

The Wizard of Zero

According to Sibal's zero theories,

At Ramlila there were no injuries, 

"We're a corruption free nation, 

With no inflation, 

And my diet too has zero calories" 

The PM's in the Dark

The PM stands and pensively stares, 

He's powerless, but he's unaware, 

He hasn't a clue 

Why he's in such a stew,

"I'm a world statesman," he declares. 

Rent-a-chappal

Suresh Kalmadi was not dismayed, 

When a chappal* was lobbed his way, 

He demanded a pair,

Of the thrower's footwear,

To rent at three thousand a day.
Chappal=slipper

CD Baat or "Seedhi Baat"

Amar Singh missed the media limelight, 

Flashing a CD, he began a fight,

Did he doctor conversations,

Or concoct allegations,

Have his mental faculties taken flight?

Killer Veggies

With rat poison your vegetables are tainted, 
With DDT fruits are painted,  
Ingest a toxic cocktail   
That will make you wail, 
If you haven't read this,  you've probably fainted.

A Helicopter's Wedding

The 250 crore wedding of the political elite* 

Invited fat cats to a sumptuous retreat, 

Thirty thousand guests

Attended and blessed,

A helicopter for shopping down the street.

*Congress leader Kanwar Singh Tanwar's son married the daughter of another Congressman Sukhbir Singh Jaunapuria.

Budget Blues

On Budget Day the status quo prevailed, 

Abject media applauded and hailed,

FM tossed a few crumbs, 

To the meek and the numb, 

While the looters rejoiced and drank ale.