Saturday, December 31, 2011

Happy New Jeer

2011 was not a year of cheer
With inflation life was austere,
Prices continue to be high,
And consumers do cry, 
Nothing's changed; Happy New Year.

Saturday, December 17, 2011

Wine, Tweet and Song

I'm in a melancholic funk, 
If I sing a song, 
They'll say I'm wrong
I think I'll become a monk. 

Sunday, December 4, 2011

FDI: Frantic Didi Intervenes

FDI's been put on hold 
Indefinitely, so we're told, 
So Mamata said,
Ministers ran and fled, 
And the PM's out in the cold.

Wednesday, November 9, 2011

Free for All

Mamata set the rioters free
Who were on a destructive spree
"Don't you dare dictate
How I run my state
So please stop harassing me."

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Beauty and the Botox

You love their pouts and their smiles,
Their looks defy age all the while, 
That actor's face, 
Of wrinkles not a trace, 
It's the Botox and the surgeon's guile.

Friday, September 23, 2011

BPL: Babus' Pathetic Lies

With Planning Commission's expertise,
When mandarins croak,
Such pathetic jokes,
They suffer from deficiency disease.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Behenji's Sandal Park

The UP memorials are eyesores, 
Designer sandals Behenji adores, 
Arrived for her to wear
Expect statues of sandals galore. 

Saturday, August 27, 2011

His Master's Voice

Said Tiwari, his face all aglow,
His facile regret
Maybe a veiled threat
To abuse on nightly news shows. 

Monday, August 8, 2011

Sheila's CAGmire

Chief Minister Sheila Dikshit
"It's Kalmadi's fault 
That the scams did vault 
And causing my hysterical fits."

Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Dementia Redefined

Is dementia growing by degrees
Spread by CWG expertise?
Now Kalmadi the astute
Says his memory's kaput,
His next ailment is surely heart disease.

Friday, July 15, 2011

The Sleepwalk Shuffle

And inducted a few, all dull-hued, 
Critics gave a thumbs down, 
To the new set of clowns, 
Proclaiming "What a vacuous brood!" 

Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Rich Tea and Sympathy

Kalmadi, the Tihar detainee,
Drank tea and purred with glee:
"Tihar Jail's the new Ritz,
For snacks and biscuits,"
While he sunbathed for Vitamin D.

Monday, June 27, 2011


It was Bubblegumgate last week, 
Pranab's office was bugged so he shrieked, 
Why is he surprised, 
When he should surmise 
Like a sieve all ministries leak.

Saturday, June 11, 2011

The Wizard of Zero

According to Sibal's zero theories,
"We're a corruption free nation, 
With no inflation, 
And my diet too has zero calories" 

Thursday, June 2, 2011

The PM's in the Dark

The PM stands and pensively stares, 
He's powerless, but he's unaware, 
He hasn't a clue 
Why he's in such a stew,
"I'm a world statesman," he declares. 

Sunday, May 22, 2011

Clueless in Blunderland

India's youth icon cannot differentiate, 
Cow dung, bones or ash phosphate,
Telecom losses are zero,
The Home minister's a hero, 
When he cannot terror suspects locate. 

Tuesday, May 17, 2011

Utterly Butterly Amul Babies

State poll results gave Jaya cheers,
But Amul Babies were in tears,
Most lost elections,
"There'll be a resurrection,"
Said Mani Shankar Aiyer, "in twenty years."

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

The Statues' Handbags

When farmer's protests began to drag 
Mayawati snarled angrily and bragged:
"Police with firearms 
Nab leaders in farms,
And ignore my statues with handbags."

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

In ISI's Bed

Osama evoked fear and dread, 
The ISI said he was lost or dead, 
In the mountains they proclaimed, 
He lived with wives and dames,
Till the US found him in ISI's bed. 

Wednesday, April 27, 2011


Suresh Kalmadi was not dismayed, 
When a chappal* was lobbed his way, 
He demanded a pair,
Of the thrower's footwear,
To rent at three thousand a day.

Wednesday, April 20, 2011

CD Baat or "Seedhi Baat"

Amar Singh missed the media limelight, 
Flashing a CD, he began a fight,
Did he doctor conversations,
Or concoct allegations,
Have his mental faculties taken flight?

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Cash Cows

Amma promised her farmers free cows,
To yield returns better than the Dow,
Sixty thousand bovine
Are hard to assign;
O Jayalalitha, the question is how. 

Monday, April 11, 2011

Ambulance Income Delivery System

You're moaning with pain in your bed,
The hospital you await with dread,
Sirens screech and crash,
Ferries you to an election booth instead.

Thursday, March 31, 2011

Marxist Theory of "Relativity"

Indian politics, it's said, is a cesspool, 
Communists say they're honest as a rule,
Will Marxist dialectic 
Turn voters apoplectic 
Will the polls' Red dynasties make us drool? 

After deriding dynastic rule for years, 
Have Communists decided to change gears,
Relatives of comrades,
Into elections now wade,
Will West Bengal polls end in tears?

Thursday, March 24, 2011


I'd like to thank you all, 
To your health I'll drink on my wall, 
Here's a glass of wine
Vegetarian, so it's fine, 
Because of you, I've had such a ball.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Killer Veggies

With rat poison your vegetables are tainted, 
With DDT fruits are painted,  
Ingest a toxic cocktail   
That will make you wail, 
If you haven't read this,  you've probably fainted.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011

Maomata Goes Hi-tech

Mamata hired a Hot Male tech head
With smses the electorate will be fed, 
Will voters be confused 
By messages diffuse
And vote for the communists instead.

Friday, March 4, 2011

A Helicopter's Wedding

The 250 crore wedding of the political elite* 
Invited fat cats to a sumptuous retreat, 
Thirty thousand guests
Attended and blessed,
A helicopter for shopping down the street.

*Congress leader Kanwar Singh Tanwar's son married the daughter of another Congressman Sukhbir Singh Jaunapuria.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

Budget Blues

On Budget Day the status quo prevailed, 
Abject media applauded and hailed,
FM tossed a few crumbs, 
To the meek and the numb, 
While the looters rejoiced and drank ale. 

Monday, February 21, 2011

A Money Laundering Primer

You've illegally stashed billions offshore
Morph black into white: that's the score,
Round trip the loot
To Dalal Street, funds multiply galore.
FII= Foreign Institutional Investors

Monday, February 14, 2011

The Love Merchants

The lovesick season has begun,
Love merchants are enjoying the fun, 
Don't be swayed 
By their wooing B Grade
They'll fleece you honey, better run.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

Amar Singh's Pants

Our leaders are mired in sleaze,
Looting taxpayers as they please, 
When asked to recant, 
Performing a political striptease. 

Sunday, February 6, 2011

Swindlers List

Mubarak's embezzled 70 billion offshore
Massive corruption, the protesters roared, 
Because our PM's an "honest senor."
'Neta' means leader

Monday, January 31, 2011

Davos Drivel

The Davos speakers are suave and civil, 
But rant mind numbing drivel,  
Their opinions hurled,
Haven't changed the world, 
As our brains begin to wither and shrivel.

Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Loot and Scoot


In Swiss banks, embezzled funds take root,
For double taxation reasons, 
It's grand larceny season, 
So politicos can now plunder and scoot.

Thursday, January 20, 2011

Deck Chairs Rearranged

The Cabinet was finally reshuffled
Did the PM really want a kerfuffle, 
Some deck chairs rearranged,
The public's been shortchanged,
Were sulking ministers the only ones ruffled?

Saturday, January 15, 2011

Happy Birthday Queen Mahamaya

Mayawati is now Mahamaya,
On her birthday she does aspire,
Present garlands of cash
And an ATM for the stash,
Disobey, the consequences will be dire.

Wednesday, January 12, 2011

2G Maths

Kapil Sibal may be a lawyer who's bright, 
Now we all have skills,
To display at will, 
Becoming brain surgeons at the speed of light.

Thursday, January 6, 2011

The Bofors Ghost Returns

The Congress party began to relax, 
No threat from the supine media hacks, 
Then rose Bofors' ghost,  
And the Taxman's boast,  
"Take 'commissions', but pay your tax."